How To Have Wild Monkey Sex


 

People sometimes think just because I’m a male enhancement specialist, sex must be the only thing I’m interested in.

It’s true. Sex, and how to improve it for you, is one of my passions.

But I’m just as big on the science of my supplements…and science in general.

The Discovery Channel, National Geographic, even those Disney nature documentaries…I can’t get enough.

And today I have a story for you that combines sex and science.

It was a biology lesson I’ll never forget.

A few weeks ago, I took a trip to the San Diego Zoo.

I went there with Julie, a woman I just started seeing.

Julie is sharp and funny. She’s a reader, which I love. She owns her own business, like me.

And there was something in her smile…a certain saucy sparkle in her eye…

I just knew she had a wild side.

On our first date, she mentioned how much she loved animals, so I thought this would be a treat for our third time out.

Plus, San Diego is a few hours’ drive from LA, where we both live. And I wanted something kinda big for our third date.

Because you know what they say about third dates…right?

So when we got to the zoo, Julie blew past the birds and the big cats.

She didn’t even care about the zoo’s famous giant pandas.

All she wanted to see was this one habitat on the Monkey Trail.

All Julie was interested in were the bonobo monkeys.

Bonobos come from the Congo River region of Africa. They’re our closest genetic relatives, along with chimpanzees (they live on the other side of the river from the bonobos).

hippie_chimp1

Bonobo Monkeys: our closest genetic (and sexual) relative.

And as I learned from our day at the zoo…

These guys are basically the free-love swingers of the animal kingdom.

(Live Science once wrote an article about the bonobos called “Hippie Chimps.”)

The first thing I noticed was how mellow the bonobos seemed.

They were mostly just hanging around in the shade, eating, and playing.

This was a big difference from the chimpanzees we passed on our way to the bonobo habitat.

The chimps were hollering and growling. Two of them were fighting over some apples the zookeepers had given them.

A recent Live Science article about chimpanzees had a very different title than their bonobo piece.

Chimps, it said, are “Naturally Violent.”

And that violence extends to their sex lives.

If bonobo life is like a free-love commune (and I’ll tell you what I saw in a minute)…chimpanzee mating is a nastier version of what goes on in bars and nightclubs every weekend.

Males fight and literally kill other males for rights to a female.

Sometimes, they’ll beat or slap the female chimps to get sex from them.

And the sex they get is pretty much like I described before: one position, all the time.

Sex among chimpanzees is strictly to produce more chimps, or so a male can mark a female as “his.”

And nobody’s enjoying it.

All you have to do to see how different bonobo sex is from chimp sex is watch two bonobos say hello.

handshake

Bonobo Monkeys have a “unique” way of saying hello.

Julie and I saw two bonobos approach each other, hoot a couple of times…

and start rubbing each other’s crotches.

“Look,” Julie said with a smile. “They’re saying hi.”

(Scientist Vanessa Woods referenced this by calling her book about ape sex Bonobo Handshake.)

And this wasn’t about marking territory. That was easy to see when we watched the same two bonobos “say hi” to other apes the same way.

On the other side of their habitat, a few more bonobos were finishing up a hearty lunch of fruit, nuts, and eggs.

How did they burn off the lunchtime bloat?

With an orgy, of course.

Julie told me bonobos do this a lot.

Sometimes, it’s to celebrate a big event, like a new ape arriving in the habitat.

Sometimes, it’s exercise, like what we were watching.

And sometimes, they break into group sex…just because.

Julie and I spent almost our entire time at the zoo in front of the bonobo habitat.

It seemed like we saw some new sex behavior every five minutes.

We watched females “present” to males at the drop of a hat…

…and have sex with multiple males in the same short time.

We saw apes of both sexes masturbate, have oral sex, and enjoy frottage.

(Back in high school, we called that dry humping.)

And two of the bonobos did something we’re always told only humans do:

They had sex face to face.

Bonobo_sexual_behavior_1

Bonobos are the only other animal species (besides humans) who have sex face to face.

And it wasn’t just hard, detached pumping like you’d get from chimps.

These two were into each other.

They touched, held hands, even kissed.

And they made eye contact the whole time.

They even do that during “doggy-style.” The female looks back at the male as he goes to town.

The result of all this sexual openness and variety?

A community much more gentle, peaceful, and (from what I could see) happy than what you find with those brawling, grudge-fucking chimps.

And I can tell you for sure…

…watching this was having a strong effect on Julie.

Their freedom, their utter enjoyment of the sex they were having…

She kept letting out little sighs and coos.

Every time two (or more) of the apes coupled up, she moved a little closer to me.

And she held my hand the entire time we watched the two intimate, face-to-face ape lovers.

When we walked to the car after we left, Julie seemed almost like she’d just had sex herself.

She had her arm around my waist, and her hip kept bumping me as we walked.

“So,” I asked her, “you come see these guys a lot?”

“Not a lot,” she replied. “Just with the men I really like.”

Our third date ended the way a third date should end.

And, let me tell you, I picked up some valuable tips from those monkeys that day.

Sure, bonobos have face-to-face sex, just like us…but that’s definitely not all they do.

So be sure to try a range of different sex positions and activities.

To get you started, I’ve got a little variation on doggy-style for you to try.

It’s exciting and different enough that I think it might even put a smile on a chimp’s face.

It’s called…The Full Bonobo

SpiderMoArt004

The Full Bonobo Position allows for deep penetration.

It starts with a standard doggy-style position. She should keep her legs together.

Now, instead of thrusting away on your knees, in this position you throw your legs over her hips and plant your feet flat.

Your stance should be almost like a sumo wrestler’s.

From this position, you’ll be able to penetrate deeper than standard doggy-style allows.

It also keeps your hands free for all that touching and squeezing the bonobos like so much.

If getting in this stance is a little too much for you, you can try doing it with just one leg.

The other leg will brace you up on your knee, just like in standard doggy-style.

I call this variation The Half Bonobo.

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The Half Bonobo allows you to brace yourself.

Now, I can tell you firsthand that these variations on your classic “Doggystyle” will definitely add some edge and excitement to your next sexual session. In fact, I put them to use right after Julie and I got home from the zoo.

And Julie was moved by the experience.

I could tell by how she tossed her hair…

…  how she grinned over her shoulder, and licked her lips when I entered her.

The way she leaned back into every thrust.

It’s a good thing it was deserted at the rest area where she and I stopped on the way home.

Of course, there’s a good chance the cars whipping by could still hear her.

The orgasm I gave her in this position made her scream like…

…well…

a wild animal.

Of course, I had some help from my male supplement, PHGH.

I designed this all-natural product with the same idea as the bonobos:

Sex, whenever, wherever, however you have it, should always deliver maximum pleasure.

PHGH is calibrated to deliver the most complete sexual experience of any supplement now available.

Click here to learn more about PHGH and what it can do for you.

Julie and I are headed back to the zoo this weekend.

There’s a new snake she’s dying to see.

I hope this weekend, when your partner tells you you’re like a wild animal…

You’ll know exactly what she means.

For your health,

John Lawrence

P.S. If you try out the Happy Bonobo, or any new sexual experiences, after reading this blog, leave a comment on here and let me know how it goes! I’m always happy to hear about your sex success stories.

4 comments on “How To Have Wild Monkey Sex

  1. matt on said:

    love all the great things you and Shawna tell me , more is GOOD !

  2. A J on said:

    nice

  3. Kevin on said:

    Good info.

  4. Peter on said:

    Hey John
    Love you articles, “keep up” the good work!
    The other morning I had an interesting experience that I would love to hear you comment on. My girlfriend and I love morning sex for the reasons you talked about in an earlier article. this last time we had morning sex I did not go empty my bladder as is a usual ritual for both my gf and myself before we start any fooling around. Well after some beautiful morning sex, I found myself on top, jerking off while my girlfriend was rubbing her clit, I got so excited when I saw her I started to just rub my head on her clit and that’s when it happened, I started to “SQUIRT” all over her clit. No I wasn’t cumming I was squirting! WOW what a rush, I had read about male squirting and now I know what they are talking about.

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